October 4th 2024 | Arrival into Venice, Italy.

I am not a visitor. I am so at home. I am in one of my parallel actualized lives. They have merged. That is my sudden awareness. That is perhaps what I’ve been feeling all these years when I would feel that I had left a part of me here.

It is a parallel life

Whose timeline has merged.

Such open fullness in my cells.

I live here. Whether my body is here or not. And now, my spirit has found my body again. Things make sense. In the most insensible way.

Four years ago just at the beginning of covid days, I was sitting in the trees at my  favorite park on Longboat Key in a quiet space, wondering about our future, and a million other things. Probably drinking coffee.

And I perceived these strings - these energetic configurations that were perceivable to me using heightened senses that were even sharper with the concerns over the pandemic.  I observed them - the life in them. If we move them a certain way… we create ripples in the universe. We create everything with the movement of the string.

Then the consideration came that within each string, we could focus to see even more information. And the source of their creation.

Yesterday was a curious day. In this life of almost 50 years, which I can’t believe, I’ve celebrated the sacred and the sanctuary in so many different ways.

The collective experience of holy days and then the individual one. Mine. Wrestling with emotions and experiences of self and other.

Grace

If you don’t believe in grace…

I had finally done it. Sold my things. Bought the one-way ticket. I was heading to St Lucia.

Mom had been gone a year. I had told my family after she passed that I would be heading out of the US again by the year’s end. To help them prepare for my departure.

First of all

I love you here.

You are welcome here.

I am your mother.

I can hold you.

I am not out of balance. Much of the destruction you see here is from external applications.

“You’re going to Costa Rica.”

I am? Terrific. That is absolutely terrific. And how was that about to happen?

But the Voice was the kind you listen to, the kind that offers no space for hesitation. The definitive truth has been spoken.

Really.

You never know just when that is going to hit. Any normal person, proceeding with logic and truth of a certain kind would have smiled and waved and simply kept walking on past that voice. I knew this voice though, and I knew she meant business.

I sit in La Samanna preparing for kundalini meditation with some guests here.

And this song, this chant, plays loud and opens my heart. I share it:

Ong Namo, Guru Dev Namo

Ong Namo, Guru Dev Namo

It means: “I bow to the subtle divine wisdom. I bow to the divine teacher within.”

A woman once asked why the Stones had chosen me. “They didn’t,” I told her. “They choose everyone.” Everyone. But not everyone chooses them back.” I, quite simply, did. I happen to talk to rocks. Or more accurately, I listen to them. They do most of the talking…

I said to her, “You are exponential goddess.” Most likely, something I needed to say to my very own self. Or something I needed to hear. Never fails. We are so f*#*ing divine incarnate. We are so third eye/crown chakra/bring it to my heart chakra, pull it up through my root chakra, how much is your second chakra spinning vibrant vital.

Human love is inconceivable. The great experiment that continues to become exponential in its outcomes. It is the ultimate generative life force. It is also a measurable frequency, and a visible code to me. And when it is imputed/applied to another code, an entirely new algorithm is formed. And this is the space of what some call Miracles.